Rants, Raves, & Random Thoughts

Shameless self-promotion of my writing skills or lack there of.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Dar-Wednesday and Happy Thanksgiving

That’s right, it is time for another installment of The Darwin Awards.




(14 April 2008, Texas) A contract worker was hired to install reinforcement bars on a communications tower near Camp Bullis. He was wielding power tools high above the ground, working feverishly on the bolts of a reinforcement bar, when two other workers saw him lean back and fall 225 feet to his death. Turns out, the man had loosened the bolts on the bar to which he was attached. Police are calling it a tragic accident. I’m calling it natural selection.











And on a happier note… For my American friends I hope you have a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving weekend. May your birds be juicy and your martinis dry.

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Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Book Review: Heart-Shaped Box

I recently had the pleasure of reading Heart-Shaped Box by Joe Hill. This is the story about an aging heavy-metal star who collects artifacts of the macabre: A cookbook for cannibals, a used hangman’s noose, a snuff film. He gets more than he bargains for when he buys a dead man’s suit over the internet. The suit is haunted and after it is delivered in a black, heart-shaped box, the suits former owner is everywhere… behind the bedroom door, in his car, in his office, watching TV and all the while, dangling a gleaming razor blade on a chain from one hand. The ghost knows the rocker and wants him and anyone foolish enough to help him… to die.

Heart-Shaped Box is a perverse, dark, mesmerizing, and often witty horror tale of the highest caliber and quite frankly the most intense, disturbing and downright scary book I’ve read in a decade. In short, I love it. Seriously folks, if you’re a fan of good suspense, then this book is a must have for your collection.




Rating: 5 out of 5 Stars




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Monday, November 24, 2008

Weekend Recap

I’d like to take a moment to welcome Aleah Faith and Noah James Goodman to the world. My niece and nephew arrived amid much fanfare and instant love at approximately 5:00 pm on Friday afternoon. Both are healthy and well… adorable. Congrats to my brother and his wife.

Saturday we went to the NIN concert. It was one of the most visually stimulating shows I’ve ever attended and the music, well… it was outstanding. I’ve written and deleted at least two paragraphs describing some of the effects they used, both nothing seems to do the performance justice (I’m fully aware that this is an odd thing for a writer to admit). Here is a little taste I found on the web to show what I’m struggling to put into words.



We had several other fun-filled activities that filled the weekend (some of which included, dancing, laughing, singing and of all things shuffleboard), but suffice it to say, the latest addition to our family was the highlight followed closely by the concert.

So, what did you do this weekend?

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Friday, November 21, 2008

Friday 55

Welcome to Friday 55. The object of the exercise is to write a story using exactly 55 words. If you participate, be sure to drop a comment at G-Man’s blog so others will know how to find your story.


Fingers grip me, tender, rough, urgent. She gulps in air between the moans. Her body glistens with sweat. My hands slide under her, grip her shoulder, brings her closer. She gasps. She pushes. Her body falls limp. I grip her hand. The baby’s cry pulls me away. Tears of mourning fall on tears of life.



Don’t forget to stop by Oh, Get a Grip! today to check out my post for the day.

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Thursday, November 20, 2008

Faces

My publisher put together an author blog, Gems of Romantic Fiction.




My day every month is on the 19th. Yes, I know that was yesterday and yes, I posted my contribution for the month. In retrospect, I probably should’ve mentioned it here in addition to my Darwin Award.

I wrote about being entertained, but it appears that I wasn’t very entertaining. I didn’t receive a single comment. Oh, well… there’s always next month. If you get a chance, please swing by and check it out.

And with that I leave you with a prime example of faces not to make when speaking in public:

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I’m pretty sure, I was just being very animated as I read the story, but the picture still gave me a chuckle.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Dar-Wednesday

That’s right, it is time for another installment of The Darwin Awards.




(26 February 2008, France) A 71-year-old pensioner met a shocking end when his frugal attempt to illuminate his yard with power siphoned from the National Grid backfired spectacularly.


The gentleman in question illegally opened a major power junction box at the front of his house, intending to hard-wire a cable to his garden shed. Unfortunately, the poor chap attempted to do this rewiring during a major downpour.


The fatal result was all too predictable. He was immediately deep fried and declared deceased at the scene.



Hmm…. Crispy.

So, the moral of the story? Don’t mess with electricity unless you are qualified to do so and NEVER attempt to wire a live box in the rain.




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Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Book News

Have you had a chance to check out Tuttle’s House of Horror

yet?




Here is a blurb:


Tyler Duke has a plan. With the help of his closest friends, he will open the doors to the infamous Tuttle House on Halloween and provide a weekend of thrills and chills for curiosity seekers. Why is the house infamous? It was the sight of the largest mass murder in the history of Northeastern Oklahoma.


If all goes well, they’ll earn enough money to spend spring break in Cancun, but unbeknownst to them, someone has taken up residence in the old mansion and he has a plan of his own. Bobo hopes the weekend brings people in droves. Nothing would make this twisted clown happier than to put gaping smiles under the faces of the house’s patrons. If he can just maintain control of his inner demon until the grand opening, it will be his greatest achievement, a night so brutal even the Fallen will take notice.


Will Tyler and his friends discover the killer in their midst before it’s too late or will they become the main attraction in Tuttle’s House of Horror.



The masses are calling this one an edgy YA, but sure to appeal to suspense enthusiasts of any age.


And it can be yours for a whopping $4.50. That’s right, for the price of a happy meal you can lose yourself in the twisted world of my imagination.

Come on, you know you want to. Go ahead, take the plunge. The water’s fine.

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Monday, November 17, 2008

Weekend Recap

I should be in town all week. I’m not quite sure what to do with myself. The good folks at the airport will probably wonder what happened to me. With any luck, they will have to miss me until at least after Thanksgiving. Keep your fingers crossed.

We had a recoup weekend. It turns out that my wife was also feeling the strain of working hard and playing hard, so we took nearly the entire weekend and did… absolutely nothing. I didn’t even rent movies. We slept in, talked about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, napped and just hung out. It was a good weekend.

I did manage to sneak in a bit of promo on Sunday and I did write a few paragraphs, but mainly I used the weekend to recharge my failing batteries.

I anticipate a full week of blogging. I know, it’s a strange concept, but it is long over due. There has been so much going on in my life lately, one would think I have an endless supply of blog material. Sadly, the sheer volume of activity has kept me away from the ol’ Blogoshpere. Oh well, life happens…

How did you spend your weekend?

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Monday, November 10, 2008

Weekend Recap

So, I was interviewed by a newspaper:


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And I did a reading and book signing on Saturday. It was a lot of fun and I’m grateful for the opportunity. I think I would like to do more events like this one.

Other than that, I hung out with friends, danced, played, sang, laughed, loved… and lived. It was a fun-filled weekend to say the least.

So, what did you get up to?

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Friday, November 07, 2008

Friday 55

Welcome to Friday 55. The object of the exercise is to write a story using exactly 55 words. If you participate, be sure to drop a comment at G-Man’s blog so others will know how to find your story.



Tick-Tock. The sound should be reassuring. Its rhythm matches my heart. Tick-Tock. For now, at least. Tick-Tock. Soon, I’ll feel the surge. Tick-Tock. My mind will fade. Tick-Tock. Faces stare at me through the window, remorseless, hateful, sobbing. Tick-Tock. I give them a wink and a smile. Tick-Tock. The warden hits the switch. Tick--

Don’t forget to stop by Oh, Get a Grip! today. This week we are discussing… well, just swing by and take a gander.

Oh, and if you happen to find yourself in Northeastern Oklahoma over the weekend, I’m doing a reading and book signing at the Sapulpa Public Library this Saturday from 11 to 1. Stop by and say hello.

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