Rants, Raves, & Random Thoughts

Shameless self-promotion of my writing skills or lack there of.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Chili Today, Hot Tamale

Well, the dust is finally settling from the whirlwind that is our holiday weekend. I love spending so much time with family and friends. It is my favorite part, well it is a toss up between that and the food, lol. I bet I gained seven pounds during the last five days. Oh well, you only live once, right?

Of course, there is still one more major party in the works… We decided to do something different this year and host a New Year’s Eve Party. I was trying to come up with a fun menu for the party and my wife decided to take an impromptu survey among several of the attendees and the general consensus was… chili. Yes, I’m to make a giant pot of chili and then have a variety of support foods to eat with it: Fritos and the works for Chili Pie, pasta, hot dogs, etc.

Well, I haven’t made chili in eons and I have a decent recipe, but I thought this might provide an excellent opportunity for a contest. I want to hear your favorite chili recipes. If I choose yours, you will then have a choice of your own. You can either have a free e-book or you can be a character in my next book. Sound good?

Oh, and to get us started, here is my recipe:


• Olive oil

• 4 medium onions, chopped

• 2 medium green peppers, chopped

• 10 pounds ground beef

• 1 6 oz. can tomato paste

• 2 large cans(1 lb-13oz) cans stewed tomatoes

• 2 1lb cans tomato sauce

• 1 10oz. can Rotel

• 6 cloves garlic, minced

• 2 3oz. jars chili powder

• 1jalapeno pepper (seeded, de-veined and chopped)

• 2 tablespoons salt

• 1 tablespoon oregano

• 2 teaspoons garlic powder

• 1 tablespoon ground black pepper


Brown meat in large skillet (you may have to do 2 batches of browning) and drain. Heat oil in a very large pot over medium heat. Saute onions, green peppers, and garlic until softened, about 10 minutes. Add meat, tomato paste, stewed tomatoes and tomato sauce. Stir in garlic powder, chili powder, salt, black pepper, oregano, Rotel, and jalapeno. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 3 hours, stirring every 15 minutes or so. Season to taste with salt and pepper halfway through cooking time.

Let the games begin…

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Friday, December 19, 2008

Friday 55

Welcome to Friday 55. The object of the exercise is to write a story using exactly 55 words. If you participate, be sure to drop a comment at G-Man’s blog so others will know how to find your story.

Want to play along? Let me know if you do so that I can come read your entries.

Elbow pads, check. Knee pads, check. Steel toed boots, check. Flack vest, check. Helmet with face shield, check. I wish I had a riot control shield, but hopefully…this will be enough. I have to drop into a real hot spot. Picking up essentials at the local Wal-Mart this time of year is pure hell.

As it is that time of year, I have a special present for all of my readers: A free short story.
You can read it Here.

Happy Reading!!!!


Wednesday, December 10, 2008


It’s time for another installment of The Darwin Awards.

(6 August 2008, Hong Kong) It's raining. You're lonely. Why not?

That was how 41-year-old Xian found himself face down on a bench, and calling for help in the middle of the night. The lonely man had noticed that the steel sit-up benches in LanTian Park had numerous ventilation holes, and thought it might be possible to use them for sexual gratification.

Enticing orifices.

Once Xian became aroused, he found he was stuck and could not remove himself from the hole in the bench. Quite understandably, he panicked. Police received a call from a disturbed man, and arrived to find poor Xian trapped face-down on the bench.

Doctors were summoned to the scene. They tried, but emergency workers had to cut the entire bench free and take him to the hospital.

Four painful hours later, doctors finally separated Xian from his bench. It is certainly possible that the lack of blood flow easily could have caused sufficient damage that doctors would have been forced to remove his penis.

This is a bad date that Xian will never forget. Though he lived through the ordeal, he still managed to effectively remove himself from the gene pool, making him quite eligible for this prize.


Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Weekend Recap

Well, it was a much better weekend than the last one. On Friday we rented a few movies, ordered takeout, and cuddled up for a nice cozy night in. We watched Hancock, Stepbrothers, and…. Zombie Strippers. Good times.

Saturday, we knocked out most of our Christmas shopping and hope to finish the rest this weekend. It was an odd year for me as this was the first one that my son didn’t put a single toy on his list for me to shop from. Oh well, I guess they all have to grow up sometime.

Saturday evening my brother, his wife, my nephew, the twins and another friend of ours came over. We grilled copious amounts of ribs, played cards and settled in to watch boxing for the rest of the night. Most of the fights were at least entertaining, but I was sorely disappointed by Oscar De La Hoya’s performance. He just looked like he really didn’t want to be there and it was a sad mark in an otherwise stellar boxing career.

Sunday we gathered up a few boxes of clothing, toys, books and movies and took them to Goodwill. Hopefully they will help make someone’s Christmas a little brighter.

Then we once more manned the couch to watch X-Files and Street Kings. Other than that, we just generally enjoyed each other’s company.

So, what did you get up to over the weekend?


Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Weekend Recap

Well, I’ve had better Thanksgiving weekends. I managed to contract a rather nasty virus that picked the holiday to manifest itself. I made it to the first celebration feeling pretty good, but a little off. I couldn’t quite place the feeling, but I had a nagging suspicious that something wasn’t right. As we drove away to attend the next visit with family… it hit and hit and hit again, until I was beaten into submission. A quick change of plans found me sprawled on the couch, drifting in and out of consciousness, punctuated with violent bouts of illness and near crippling cramps. The worst of it seemed to last about 24 hours and I lost ten pounds in that time. I was left weak, shaky and wondering what the hell happened. I spent the rest of the weekend in a state of slow recovery.

Other than that, it was good to be off and at home. I’m about to go hop on a plane (I know that is unheard of these days) and head to Baton Rouge for a couple of days. At least it will be warm there. We had our first snow yesterday. I’m not ready for the biting touch of winter and it is shaping up to be a doozy.

I suppose I should stop rambling and go finish packing. I will try to return with something more interesting to talk about on Thursday.


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