Rants, Raves, & Random Thoughts

Shameless self-promotion of my writing skills or lack there of.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008


That’s right, it is time for another installment of The Darwin Awards.

At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, AAFS, President Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story:

On March 23,1994 the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. Mr. Opus had jumped from the top of a ten story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to that effect, indicating his despondency. As he fell past the ninth floor his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window which killed him instantly.

Neither the shooter nor the descender was aware that a safety net had been installed just below at the eighth floor level to protect some building workers and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned.

"Ordinarily," Dr. Mills continued, "a person who sets out to commit suicide and ultimately succeeds, even though the mechanism might not be what he intended, is still defined as committing suicide."

That Mr. Opus was shot on the way to certain death, but probably would not have been successful because of the safety net, caused the medical examiner to feel that he had a homicide on his hands. The room on the ninth floor, whence the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously and he was threatening her with a shotgun. The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger he completely missed his wife and the pellets went through the window, striking Mr. Opus.

When one intends to kill subject A but kills subject B in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject B. When confronted with the murder charge the old man and his wife were both adamant. They both said they thought the shotgun was unloaded. Thed old man said it was his long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore the killing of Mr. Opus appeared to be an accident; that is, the gun had been accidentally loaded.

The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple's son loading the shotgun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother. The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus.

Now comes the exquisite twist. Further investigation revealed that the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten story building on March 23rd, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. The son had actually murdered himself so the medical examiner closed the case as a suicide.



At 5:25 AM, Blogger lime said...

you know. if you put that into one of your books i am betting no editor would let it stand claiming it was way to contrived and conveniently coincidental. that is just about one of the most bizarre things i have ever heard. it's also a mighty fine example of cosmic justice.

At 5:35 AM, Blogger Breazy said...

Wow! What a story. You know what they say about Karma though so I guess Mr. Ronald Opus got his due, too bad it was basically from his own doing.

Hope you are rested and doing well! :)

At 6:31 AM, Blogger Mona said...

Getting entrapped in the web that he wove for others!

Reminds me of 'Rat Trap'... a short story I read was so symbolic of our own webs that we weave! Although the story was nothing like this one!

LOL! that is funny & bizarre!

At 8:26 AM, Blogger ciara said...

now THAT was weird. lol

At 8:32 AM, Blogger Kelly Kirch said...

My word. If you put that in a book, NO ONE would believe it. In fact, an editor would tell you it just isn't realistic.

At 7:58 PM, Blogger Donnetta Lee said...

Good Lord, James! That has to be the best one you have ever come up with. That family must be carrying around lots and lots of bad karma. How do we define "irony?" Woooo.

At 9:28 PM, Blogger jillie said...

OMG...that is some story!! I guess it just goes to show you, be careful for what you wish for....yikes!!!!


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