The Lovely Lime
came up with this meme. I won’t tag anyone, but if you feel like doing it, let me know so I can come see your answers.
1. Canned peas: tasty and economical preserved veggie or olive drab pellets of vileness?
I used to eat canned peas on occasion, but after reading Quits
by ME Ellis
I’ll never eat a canned pea again.
2. Mayonnaise: delectable artery-clogging condiment or revolting mass of congealed gunk of unknown origin?
Oh, I love mayo. I use it in macoroni salad, potato salad and a slew of other dishes.
3. Sauerkraut: great topping for a hot dog or vomit-inducing social repellent?
Just the smell makes my stomach turn. My wife on the other hand thinks it’s a gift from the gods…
4. Head cheese: tasty deli meat or the remnants from a bad sinus infection?
I think this nasty concotion should come with a free box of tissues. Yuk…
5. Explain your theory on who would actually eat pickle and pimento loaf.
Well, I think these two deli choices come from people that were either too lazy or too pressed for time to dress a proper sandwhich.
6. What would you do for a Klondike Bar?
Not much. They are alright, but in truth…I’m really not a sweets kind of guy.
7. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
As many as it takes to get the job done.
8. While we are on the subject, how do you eat your cream cone?
I give it to my wife so that we both can enjoy it.
9. What kind of ice cream cone is best?
One eaten by a lady.
10. Organ meats?
Sure, I’ve been known to eat gizzards, but I’ll only eat the other organ meats out of necessity.
11. Why would anyone contaminate perfectly divine chocolate with shredded coconut?
I suppose it would be for variety. I’m sure there are some people in the world that think chocolate is just so so as a standalone dessert.
12. Then what should I do with this lovely bunch of coconuts?
Food Fight! Oh, wait…that would be a rough little brawl. All Kidding aside, I would shred them for use with coconut shrimp.
13. Give me your thoughts on brussels sprouts.
Yummy… I make a batch of brussel sprouts at least two times a month.
14. And artichokes?
Oh, this strange looking thing has a way of livening up some of the most bland casseroles.
15. Invertebrates as a food source?
If I had to use one thing to eat for the rest of my life…this would be it. I Love oysters, clams, scallops, etc… My mouth’s watering already.
16. Describe a properly cooked and adorned hot dog.
The Dog must be grilled. A think layer of shredded cheese is sprinkled on the bottom of the bun. A splash of mustard goes on top of that. The hot dog is placed in the bun. A thin layer of slaw is placed in the bun next. Thin a liberal sprinkling of minced onions. Chili locks these ingredients into the bun and another layer of cheese on this finishs it up.
17. How did Wonder Bread get that name?
I’m sure it was an advertising gimmik to make kids think they were getting something special with their pb and j
18. What possessed anyone to look at the droppings of a palm civet and think they should search through it for coffee beans to roast so they could market it as the highest priced coffee in the world?
I don’t know, but I’m really glad they did. I drink coffee more than any other beverage during a normal day.
19. Twinkies: irresistible junk food or indestructible weapon?
20. What is the best use for olives?
Pizza. Olive oil on the other hand, I use to cook most everything.
21. Normal watermelon or seedless?
Normal watermelon. Without seeds it just doesn’t seem near messy enough.
22. Have you ever had caviar?
Yes, it’s not my favorite, but I rarely turn it down when offered.
23. Tell me about a flavor experiment that went horribly awry.
I tried to make my own Sweet and Sour Pork. I didn’t have a recipe and I tried to recreate it by taste. It was a disaster.
24. File this under 'why bother?'
Beans. I hate beans. I can’t understand why anyone in the world would even think of eating them.
25. What is one dish you tasted because it looked irresistibly delicious but it turned out to be really revolting?
Pig feet. Smelled great tasted like ass.