Rants, Raves, & Random Thoughts

Shameless self-promotion of my writing skills or lack there of.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

What Would Jesus Do?

An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one
afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Irishman
looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over

The waitress nodded "yes," so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a
cup of coffee on him.

The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He
shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress
for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked,
"Is that Jesus over there?"

The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot
tea, my treat.

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Redneck on
crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey
there, sweet thang! Howsa’ about gettin' me a cold glass of Coke!" He,
too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over
there?" The waitress once more nodded, so the redneck said to give
Jesus a cold glass of Coke, "On my bill.

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman, touched him and
said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Irishman felt the
strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the

Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and said, "For your
kindness, you are healed." The Englishman felt his back straightening
up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back
flips out the door.

Then Jesus walked towards the Redneck. The Redneck jumped up and
yelled, “Don't touch me...I'm drawin' disability!"


At 4:37 AM, Blogger Leslie said...

LMFAO!! That's sick, just sick. Over half of Olahomans are like that though. Isn't it sad?

At 10:11 AM, Blogger James Goodman said...

I don't think that the problem is indicative of Oklahomans, I think this is more of nation wide mindset than we would like to admit. I know in the joke I, referenced a southerner, but I can't think of a single state that I lived in, where there wasn't someone making a living out of milking the government.

At 9:55 AM, Blogger Leslie said...

True dat!!

But a redneck Oklahoman would have said exactly so.

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