Rants, Raves, & Random Thoughts

Shameless self-promotion of my writing skills or lack there of.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

1st edition of Answers and Advice

So I came home from work today and checked my e-mail. As I browsed through the inbox, “I have a few questions for you” caught my eye. I opened it up and began to read. Then about half way through it, my mind hit the breaks. I stopped, reread the sentence and began to blush. The lady dropped a bomb on me.
My first instinct was to reply to her discreetly and explain to her that, though I am glad she likes my writing, I am not qualified to offer her relationship advice. Then I decided what the hell, this could be fun.
If you like what you see and have odd questions over any subject matter send them to me and I will answer the best I can. If you have questions but would rather not see them (or just your name) on the blog, be sure to let me know in the e-mail. Otherwise, I will consider them fair game.
If at any time, you read my advice and think I am way off base, just let me know, supply advice that you think would be more valuable and I will be sure to pass it along to the appropriate party.
I suppose I should start with the easy (ier?) questions:
How is the “Guardians on the Plains” coming? I wish I could tell you that it is done and I completed it in four weeks (Yeah, Tish I am referring to you. Tish is not Mrs. X BTW.), but the truth is I only have a few chapters completed so far. Between the re-writes, and a few other things I have been working on, I haven’t put as much time into it as I should.
Have you considered putting them into a .PDF format and just selling them from Goody’s World?No, actually I haven’t. I wouldn’t know where to start. I suppose it would be simple enough to figure out how to convert them to .PDF files, but there is a lot more to it than that. How much do I charge? How would I collect the money? The list goes on and on.
I noticed two storylines that you have posted that don’t show up on Goody’s World: “The Dance” and “The Adventures of Tyler the Great”. Do you have any plans of turning these into books? What have you got against my son? I happen to think he is a great character. Just kidding, you didn’t really upset me. As for The Dance, yes, I do plan on it becoming a novel.
Why didn’t you announce it on your PM blog or your website?Because, I have only been putting posts on the other blog after they have been on the PM blog, for the most part. I am using it as a nice way to archive old blogs. That is the primary reason I used the same name, because it is… well, more of the same. Besides you found it from my PM blog; was that not advertising enough? Will you be doing any more book reviews?I don’t know. The first one wasn’t received very well. I don’t think I got a single comment on it. My rental movie reviews seem to be doing a lot better. I won’t rule it out, but it isn’t anything I am planning to do soon.
Ok, at this point I think it prudent to leave the question/answer mode and just address the entire last portion of your letter. I have gone back and re-read everything that I currently have online and I have also come up with an inescapable conclusion: You just interpreted what you wanted to think about me from what you read. I found nothing to support your theory.
I am flattered that you found my characters so enjoyable and apparently found in them qualities with which you could associate. I have spent a fair amount of time with a fair amount of women; that does not mean that I have been intimate with all of them. I do, however, tend to listen. Most of the significant friends in my life have been women; very few of which have ever been more than friends. But, as a friend I have listened and struggled (yes, at times it was a great struggle) to understand their fears, anger, compulsions and affairs of the heart. I do not pretend to understand all of the inner workings of the female mind nor do I harbor any delusions that I ever will. Having said that, perhaps your questions would be better fielded by a woman that has either gone down that road or chose not to. I will, however, take a stab at it for you.
Physical attraction is a perfectly natural thing and women are the most exquisite creatures on earth. How could any man blame you for seeing the beauty of another woman? We do it everyday. I have several friends that have ventured over to “the other side”. Hell, who am I kidding, I have friends that live there. All I am trying to say, is that it is perfectly natural to have these feelings and don’t ever let anyone tell you that it’s not.
Before you decide to take your attractions to the next level, ask yourself what kind of relationship you are in. I bet my last dollar, that your husband will be onboard with the idea if you talk to him about it.
Is he a jealous type? Are you? Is he a truly amazing lover? How do you think he will react once he gets over the initial high of you bringing another woman into the bed and sees that she can move you in ways that he has never even dreamed of. Let’s face it, most men are clueless when it comes to what really turns a woman on. Who better knows what makes a woman purr than another woman? I realize that no two women have the exact same… needs to drive her into bliss, but I bet your new friend would be a quick study. If your husband is also a quick study and no slouch in the driving you to ecstasy department, do you really want to share that with another woman?
If you do decide to proceed, I have the following advice to your husband:This is all about her; make sure it stays that way. If she decides to back out at the last minute, let her. I don’t care how far along the situation is, if she says stop, the party's over.
Let your wife set the ground rules and don’t cross them, on pain of death (probably more like divorce, but you know what I mean). If she says no kissing, by god, she means no kissing.
I don’t care how hot the other woman is; do not stare. You should concentrate your attention on your wife; again, this is about her. Do not comment on the other woman unless it is to agree with something your wife says first. The obvious exception is if she encourages you to do so, but even then; don’t go overboard. A woman’s self-confidence, in such a vulnerable position, is fragile at best, especially if it’s the first time.
This is not a free pass to sleep with any woman you want. It is a shared experience that happens to involve you. Under no circumstances should you suggest the third partner. Nothing good can come of it.
Do not make the decision under the influence of alcohol. I’m not saying that some heavy drinking isn’t in order before the festivities, but I am saying that the decision needs to be made when your minds are clear.
Other than that, have fun, be safe and I hope it all works out for you.
Dear Mr. Goodman, I just wanted to say that I really enjoy your words. I was lucky enough to stumble across Goody’s World while you still had “Darkness on the Plains” on your site in its entirety. I loved it. I was sorry to see that you re-wrote it in the 3rd person but I understand why you wanted to do it. I love what you have displayed of “Blood on the Plains too (I can’t wait to read the whole thing) and the poetry and short stories are great. How is the “Guardians on the Plains” coming? Have you considered putting them into a .PDF format and just selling them from Goody’s World? I have been following your blog on Publisher’s Marketplace for some time now as well. I noticed two storylines that you have posted that don’t show up on Goody’s World: “The Dance” and “The Adventures of Tyler the Great”. Do you have any plans of turning these into books? I don’t know about the one with your son, but I would definitely like to see a book about “The Dance”. Is that the story you asked us to choose the poem for? I am also glad to see you have started another blog at blogger.com. Why didn’t you announce it on your PM blog or your website? The only reason I found it was because I was clicking through your links on the PM blog. Why did you use the same name for both blogs? Will you be doing any more book reviews? I picked up a copy of “Minion” after reading your review and you were right; it was a great book. Now on to things of a more personal nature. After reading as much of your writing as you will give me, I have come to an inescapable conclusion: You must have a lot of sex. The way you describe Selu’s feelings for Sarah is almost too hard to believe that it came from a man’s perspective. You have displayed an insight that I can only attribute to being intimate with a lot of women. I guess the other possibility is that you are gay and just spend a lot of time listening to us, but I have seen the pictures of you with your wife on your website and I am guessing this is not the case. It is the relationship not only between Selu and Sarah but of Talon too that I wanted to ask you about. Before I go any farther, I feel it necessary to point out that I am not a lesbian, not that there is anything wrong with that. I have been married for about five years to a wonderful and loving man. I have always enjoyed looking at other women, but lately I have begun to desire more than “looking” at them. I have been debating with myself whether or not discuss this with my husband, but I am not sure how he will react. More than that, I am not sure how it would affect our relationship. You really seem to know your way around a three-way relationship. The way you described the love they felt for each other, I could almost feel it with them. Did you base that relationship on personal experience? Did it make that relationship stronger as it did with your characters? Or did it end badly? Did it end at all? Most importantly would you recommend it to others? I look forward to your response.
Sincerely,Mrs. X (rated)

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